A Relational Approach to Psychotherapy and Counselling for Anxiety

This is the last in a series of posts on the relational approach to psychotherapy and counselling for common mental health issues. This post covers anxiety issues.

Like other mental health issues, there are different approaches to dealing with anxiety. The medical approach has it's advantages, but as anyone who has become hooked on sedating or anxiety reducing medication can tell you, it is not without its risks. Another approach, that of mindfulness based treatment for anxiety issues, can be very effective. By learning to control our attention through mindfulness, we can empower ourselves to regulate our physiological anxiety responses, and to deal more effectively with anxious thoughts. Neither of these approaches, however, deals with the relational context of our anxiety.

Our experience of panic, generalised, or specific anxieties is often triggered by relationship with others. In particular, we may be anxious of conflict with others, being vulnerable with others, around displaying certain emotions, or around intimacy in general. With the guidance of a psychotherapist or counsellor, we may be able to approach whatever our personal forbidden territory is, that anxiety keeps us away from. Usually when we approach this territory, we discover that it is not what we thought it is, and we can begin to get more familiar and comfortable with the anxiety provoking situation in our relationships. 

In particular, as a therapist, I would watch for moments when a client re-enacts an anxiety driven pattern with me, their therapist. For instance, a person who goes to an old pattern of care-taking in relationships, when feeling anxious, will probably do that with me, their therapist, sooner or later. Working with these moments when the issue is "live" between therapist and client can be some of the most potent opportunities for healing and transformation. 

Please let me know what you think about this, and stay tuned for further posts on other topics.